Priorities

Since having M and D going back to work, our lives have been a little more crazy than usual. The kids have been having a hard time adjusting to D being gone so much and we've had to start a new baby on breathing treatments, which causes a lot of additional craziness as well. Through this all I have been feeling very overwhelmed by the amount of things that need to get done in a day. I feel like I am constantly playing catch up and nothing is ever clean enough. I've long ago given up the hope of having a spotless house, but I do like having my house clean enough so I'm not disgusted by how dirty it is, or frustrated when I'm having to walk around piles of laundry, etc. Everyone constantly tells me, "You've just had a baby...  D just went back to work... give yourself time!" The thing is, I would LOVE to just give myself time, but when I can't even make lunch or dinner because there's too much clutter on the countertops, that's not helping me relax... it's stressing me out more. So what I've finally come to the conclusion is that I need to sit down and write down my priorities for my day to day life. What things would I like to accomplish every day? What things can be done every other day? What things can I put off doing once a week and not get stressed about them not being done every day? With four kids I think organization is key... but I feel as though I don't even have time to do the organizing! So if I can give myself maybe one organizing project a week, I will feel like I will get it done and slowly, things will get more organized. I just need to stop having the expectations of getting EVERYTHING organized RIGHT NOW. Of course, the things that are on the top of my priority list are things that can't be seen. For example, making sure that I spend time exclusively with each child every day. A lot of days go by where I will spend time with the kids, but not individually. I think that they need that time with mom to connect and talk with me... so whether it's playing with them, or reading to them, I need to have that time with them every day. I need to stop putting a clean house in front of quality time with the kiddos. In the long run, the kids will look back on their younger years and not remember a clean house, but remember a loving home where they always had access to their mommy when they needed her. THAT'S important. So that would be on my UNSEEN priority list. There's other things on that list too, like singing to the kids every night, doing our nightly devotionals, and having prayer time. Then there's the list of SEEN priorities. The seen priorities are the ones that you can see... cleaning, organizing, dinners... Dishes, dinner and laundry... those are things that need to be done every day at our house. Then of course there's other boring stuff that I'm sure no one is interested in reading about. :) So now that I have my lists started, what's on your seen and unseen lists? Do you have any pointers in organizing that have been a life saver to you? 

In the Quiet

   I meant to blog M's birth story, but right now D is reading it over to make sure I have all the facts down straight. :) I don't exactly trust my memory during that time! :)
   So while I'm waiting to post that, I'm sitting in my living room and it's QUIET. If you know my family, at all, you know what a RARE thing this is!! 
   It used to be that I couldn't stand the quiet. If it was too quiet, I would put on a cd, or the TV... anything to make noise. I now treasure it! I can think of two times in the last few months when it was completely quiet in our house. I know it's only two times because it is such a rarity here, that I stop and take it in when it actually does happen. :)
   When it's quiet I feel as though all the stuff going on in life isn't as stressful. All the tension, the to-do list, the anxiety that tends to build up... all of it just melts away for those few minutes of quiet. 
   Sometimes I wonder what I'm missing out on while life is too noisy. For example, M is sleeping right now. He's about twenty feet from me, and I can hear his even breaths... in... out... he's a little bit rattly today, which I don't like... would I have noticed that with all the noise that is usually going on?  But even more importantly, what am I missing out on God telling me? If God speaks to me in a gentle whisper, as He did with Elijah, would I hear it? I can tell you right now, that with only TWO moments of quiet in the last few months, I definitely would NOT hear God speaking to me. 
   As with everyone, we go through times where we are more stressed than other times. Right now is a more stressful time for me. D has gone back to work and in reaction to this, the kids have each had their own ways of adjusting. Each way makes my job as a mom a little more difficult. I, myself, am trying to adjust to things being different around here, and it's not easy. This is the "normal" we were praying to get back to for so long, and now that I have it, I'm exhausted by it! I know that things will get easier when everyone has once again adjusted to it, but until then it is difficult staying on top of things. I feel like I am constantly playing catch up and I REALLY don't like that. I feel like every second of the time I am awake needs to be filled with me doing something. Then, when I'm feeling burnt out, I cry out to God saying, "I need more strength for this! How do you expect me to do all of this?!" I think today... in the Quiet.. I have my answer. God doesn't want me to fill every second of my day with what I consider "productiveness." I need to have these few minutes of quiet so I can not only listen to my Father speak to me, but so I can reflect on my job as a mother and a wife. THIS is where God will give me the strength I need. THIS is where I feel rejuvenated and ready to face the rest of my day. 
   You know, I am all too ready to make excuses on why I can't have this quiet every day. There's dishes to do, there's laundry to fold, there's bills that need to get paid, there's treatments that need to get done... but if I can't take these few minutes of quiet, all those other jobs will not get done with a cheerful heart, and that will effect my children and my husband. I want to be a delight to my husband, and if I don't have a cheerful heart, how will I be that? I feel as though if I take the time to be in the quiet, and give that quiet time to God, so He can speak to me, then He will bless the rest of my time with "productiveness."
   So how about you? When was the last time you took time to sit in the quiet and listen to God? What are you missing out on Him saying and blessing you with?