I meant to blog M's birth story, but right now D is reading it over to make sure I have all the facts down straight. :) I don't exactly trust my memory during that time! :)
So while I'm waiting to post that, I'm sitting in my living room and it's QUIET. If you know my family, at all, you know what a RARE thing this is!!
It used to be that I couldn't stand the quiet. If it was too quiet, I would put on a cd, or the TV... anything to make noise. I now treasure it! I can think of two times in the last few months when it was completely quiet in our house. I know it's only two times because it is such a rarity here, that I stop and take it in when it actually does happen. :)
When it's quiet I feel as though all the stuff going on in life isn't as stressful. All the tension, the to-do list, the anxiety that tends to build up... all of it just melts away for those few minutes of quiet.
Sometimes I wonder what I'm missing out on while life is too noisy. For example, M is sleeping right now. He's about twenty feet from me, and I can hear his even breaths... in... out... he's a little bit rattly today, which I don't like... would I have noticed that with all the noise that is usually going on? But even more importantly, what am I missing out on God telling me? If God speaks to me in a gentle whisper, as He did with Elijah, would I hear it? I can tell you right now, that with only TWO moments of quiet in the last few months, I definitely would NOT hear God speaking to me.
As with everyone, we go through times where we are more stressed than other times. Right now is a more stressful time for me. D has gone back to work and in reaction to this, the kids have each had their own ways of adjusting. Each way makes my job as a mom a little more difficult. I, myself, am trying to adjust to things being different around here, and it's not easy. This is the "normal" we were praying to get back to for so long, and now that I have it, I'm exhausted by it! I know that things will get easier when everyone has once again adjusted to it, but until then it is difficult staying on top of things. I feel like I am constantly playing catch up and I REALLY don't like that. I feel like every second of the time I am awake needs to be filled with me doing something. Then, when I'm feeling burnt out, I cry out to God saying, "I need more strength for this! How do you expect me to do all of this?!" I think today... in the Quiet.. I have my answer. God doesn't want me to fill every second of my day with what I consider "productiveness." I need to have these few minutes of quiet so I can not only listen to my Father speak to me, but so I can reflect on my job as a mother and a wife. THIS is where God will give me the strength I need. THIS is where I feel rejuvenated and ready to face the rest of my day.
You know, I am all too ready to make excuses on why I can't have this quiet every day. There's dishes to do, there's laundry to fold, there's bills that need to get paid, there's treatments that need to get done... but if I can't take these few minutes of quiet, all those other jobs will not get done with a cheerful heart, and that will effect my children and my husband. I want to be a delight to my husband, and if I don't have a cheerful heart, how will I be that? I feel as though if I take the time to be in the quiet, and give that quiet time to God, so He can speak to me, then He will bless the rest of my time with "productiveness."
So how about you? When was the last time you took time to sit in the quiet and listen to God? What are you missing out on Him saying and blessing you with?
10 hours ago
